...hi

goodbye my lover

2010-11-05T23:07:00.003+11:00

"its tough to say goodbye

nobody likes change

but part of life is learning to let go"

GOODBYE BLOGGER.

and hello wordpress :]

collectionofthinks.wordpress.com

there isn't anything up there but i promise i will soon :D

i quite like the quote from above

its from modern family which i am currently TOTALLY obsessed with.. YAY

when im older i hope my family could stay together like that and be acceptive of everyone's differences :D

An extended response...

2010-09-28T12:08:00.002+10:00

Currently blogging with the iPad. This blog is basically to tell you guys that I won't be blogging much during these few hsc days but then at the same time, you guys shouldn't really be wasting time reading blogs, rather you should be studying...

... So that's all really... Ciao for now!

down the drain

2010-09-19T01:43:00.001+10:00

goes my dream of getting into unsw law

because i read the small print of the application form for bonus points and realised that my achievements should be within year 11 - 12

my first reaction was LOL i can just photoshop the number to a year later
but that is bad and cheating so i shant do that

so.. there goes my dream.
sad face.

strangely judgemental

2010-09-07T16:28:00.002+10:00

essentially it is bad to judge.

but we all do it, somehow.

some of us will judge by appearance, by race, money, height , intelligence.

but lately i feel as though im judging friends or people i don't know by their views of the current political environment

i don't feel like im a feminist, or i'm a huge labor fan, but for some reason, i get slightly pissed off when people bagg out the labor government.

or before the election, i was really negative towards those who decided to 'donkey vote' or not take their vote seriously. i know it might feel as though its only ' one vote in the millions ' but i still believe that suffrage is a human right that too many of us Australians take for granted.

am i just a result of 2 years of legal studies education? i don't know.

but i am strangly defensive over the labor government

and when people go like 'gillard is such a backstabber' for what she has done to K-rudd. i will always give the boat analogy;

in my eyes, what gillard did wasn't nice, or loving or caring or worth the nobel peace prize but it had to be done.

pretend k-rudd was the captain and gillard the vice-captain of a ship. this ship is called AUSTRALIA.

so k-rudd did a few good things do this ship called australia. swerved it out of a incredible storm called 'recession' but now the ship is sinking. quickly.

so it is the responsibility of gillard, the vice captain to stop this ship called AUSTRALIA and take over the captaincy (is that even a word?)

and its not like julia did this by herself, she had the support of the majority of the crew members, so technically what she did was democratic? and even k-rudd doesn't have any hard feelings, so why should any of us have hard feelings???

ok end of my random political rant.

thats a lie. for all those who said 'OH NOES WE ARE IN SO MUCH DEBT' im sorry but didn't we just get out of the GFC? look at greece.

ok.. end of rant.

disappointment.

2010-08-31T01:42:00.007+10:00

sucks.

today i got back the marks for 3 of my trials.

*groan*

blablabla scaling blablabla its okay because you did good before blablabla it was a hard trial, don't worry blablabla hornsby always scales english like crazy blablabla blablablabla God will provide blablabla God has plans blablablablabla

ive heard those words so many times it doesn't mean anything.

doesn't make the red mark in front of my page any higher.

katie tells me that i put myself in a standard within a standard.

mum says i put myself in my own standard, in a standard within a standard OMG LEVELS LIKE INCEPTION.

why can't i just be smart.. why?

best friends forever?

2010-08-25T00:14:00.006+10:00

so half the reason why i love trials

is because i get to watch 'ellen' and 'the view' nearly every day from 12 - 2pm.

and a topic that they have been talking a lot on the view is the whole 'can a girl and guy be best friends'. seems like quite the popular topic to talk about.

and ive come to the realisation of something.

being best friends with someone from the opposite gender only means 2 things.

1) one of you will end up falling for the other (hopefully at the same time to minimise heartbreak)

2) one of the friends will get a girlfriend/boyfriend/significant other which means that inevitably the friendship with your 'best-friend-from-the-other-gender' will indeed suffer and you wont talk anymore

ultimately, you wont end up 'best friends forever" .

it will either become something more, or something less.

unless both of you stay single and miraculously somehow not develop feelings for each other.

possible, but not likely.

ultimately i think the term 'best friend' is a term ill attempt to refrain from using

because i think not only do you place a large amount of hope and expectations on that person

that person has a whole lot of pressure to live up to the term.

to always be the 'best'.

like it should come naturally

but what if it doesn't.

like, whats wrong with a 'close friend'?

anyway off to study.

______________________________________________

i think the only thing i like about trials is the opportunity to watch ellen and the view and sleep in.

although they are both very very valid reasons.

3 painful weeks +

7 long exams +

hours of cramming +

2 breakdowns +

lots of junk/study food+

more hours of procrastination +

guilty nights +

guilty mornings +

guilty afternoons +

feelings of worthlessness / stupidity

= TRIALS

but on the up side. RICE was good. shall blog about it later.

finding it immensely difficult to study

2010-08-23T18:24:00.005+10:00

so im finding it immensely difficult to study in my 8 day weekend

and not waste it and leave it to the last minute, like always

so i have implemented a few strategies to make me study.

the study timetable

so ms whalan told us to make a study timetable for the trials

so i did. i did a plan for the whole month.

and it worked for a week. it did give me an idea of what i needed to do each week

but then i got behind and ended up changing the timetable every day

and then i lost the timetable. i think i got it mixed up with my working out paper for maths.

result; FAIL

the impossible schedule

the impossible schedule is that i give myself

impossible deadlines which make me stress out and stay up till 5 to finish.

but the point of impossible deadlines is that

they are impossible so ill obviously can't follow them

making myself guilt trip myself

to finish them eventually

e.g. 'ALISON YOU WERE MEANT TO FINISH THIS YESTERDAY AND YOU ARE STILL HALF WAY THROUGH! STUDY STUDY STUDY"

it kind of works, then i realised that they are actually impossible and i see through my own plan.

result; FAIL..

the 1/2 rest 1/2 study plan

this is implemented when i feeling particularly ceebs

when i can't be bothered to study at all

so i use the

'study for one hour, rest for another, study for another , rest for a hour"

i use this especially in holidays

so i guess it kind of works. but its no where enough study for normal days i guess

so.. yeh.

result; its okay if you aren't meant to be studying your arse off. good for those 'ima take a rest but do a little bit of study coz im nerdy like that"

the 'use food for motivation' plan

this ends up in two ways

starvation because i never get anything done.

or just eating too much coz i make the rewards like..finished every part of a maths question.

and then i just focus on eating and not on doing the question.

and it isn't very useful because if mum is at home

ill obviously have dinner

so even if i don't do any work

ill still get to eat.

so there isn't much of a punishment

so.. i never end up studying, as i know my reward will come anyway. do you get what i mean?

so the result? yeh.. FAIL.

the daily deadline

this usually comes in the form of

'you have to finish bla bla and bla today before you go to sleep'

this kind of is related to the impossible schedule only this is a day to day basis.

sometimes it works. but mostly it doesnt'

because i just go 'meh ill just do it tomorrow'

so the result i give this is... 20% success rate?

the 'clock is your friend' plan

this is where i promise myself that ill study until the little hand goes to the 7, or 10 or whatever.

but then i just end up looking at the clock every 3 minutes and realising that time goes soo slow.

and then i start procrastinating. and focused on making time go faster rather than studying.

and i calculate every single minute of my study. so i can go to sleep thinking 'i did like.. 5 hrs of study today. YAY'.

but like.. a lot of study isn't how long you've study, it is more like what u have studied that is more important. no one cares if u spent 10 hours learning polynomials. that the easiest topic ever. u suld of only spent 1 hr

so yeh.

i guess it sometimes works. more often than the daily deadline. so

result; 40% i guess.

the 'computer is your enemy plan'

this is when i attempt to stay off the computer for the whole day

this NEVER SUCCEEDS.

therefore.

result; FAIL

ok ok.. so i kind of modified it to no msn/noyoutube/no facebook.

which is working well. since i seem to be able to keep off msn quite well.

nothing good is on youtube

and lok yun hijacked (requested by me) my facebook.

so that kind of means the result is SUCCESS FOR ONCE. but . not really coz its a dodgy plan. the internet is still very much distracting. for example. my blog.

the sleep or work plan

this is what i tried to do today but it failed as well

its my theory that

i suld either be working or sleeping.

so i dont' feel like working, i suld just sleep.

and then i realise i spend all my day sleeping

and then at night time i study for like 2 hrs and think 'hey ima go on msn because that always keeps me awake" which is true

msn is my coffee. it has the miraculous ability to never make me get sleepy.

and yehh

i just end up sleeping a lot. and not working

soo therefore

result; FAIL.

and ultimately there is only one plan that really works for me.. and that is..

last minute plan.

which is basically the exam is the next day and you have to study

and i will

like 10 hrs a day no problem.

so therefore even with my 8 day weekend. ill probably stick to the plan that always works. leaving it to the last minute and CRAMMING.

yay success!

anyway im off to study

ciao for now

thinking of you

2010-08-21T00:09:00.003+10:00

you know when your just exploring your thoughts

and suddenly you cross a cringe-worthy memory

and you shake your head in an attempt to think of something else?

yeh.. story of my life.

stop and stare

2010-08-13T15:34:00.003+10:00

니가 미운 건 아냐 싫단 것도 아냐 단지 그런 눈빛이 부담일 뿐

I don’t dislike you. I don’t hate you. It’s just that your gaze makes me uncomfortable.

men were deceivers ever.

2010-08-12T20:04:00.005+10:00

that feels still true.

ive been watching this talk show held by a japanese boy band

and when they first meet a girl their first reaction is 'is she the cute type? or the beautiful type?"

like... is that the only thing on guy's mind when they first hear about a girl?

well i guess im not that much better.. like i do ask 'oh is he hot?' .. iono.. :S

i was going to start this blog off by saying in ophelia's words

'by cock they are to blame" as the title, then realised it wouldn't be that appropriate

but as i was studying and memorising my 3 essays in one night

my mind drifted upon an issue , highlighted in Fay Weldon's epistolary novel, 'Letters to Alice on first reading Jane austen" and she quotes the 1931 view from "Professions of Women" that young women should be...

"sympathetic, be tender, flatter... never let anybody guess that you have a mind of your own"

and i know this is a 1931 view, but it feels like.. have things really changed from then?

she also comments that "men are so accustomed to be flattered by women that simple honesty goes as a shock and they register it as biased and unfair"

in other words

" women are accustomed to criticism, men like to be heroes"

and so me and nana were talking about it,

how, as a girl, we reckon guys do have a massive ego,

while most girls think that they are worthless, stupid, dumb, ugly

guys think they are the best, and i do feel sometimes that some of the guys i know do think they are awesome.

and i was saying how, essentially we feed it to them.

nana agrees saying that small things like our actions feed onto their egos.

and i don't know if its just me, but i feel like

i give guys a lot more compliments compared to the amount of 'slack' i get from guys

and i realised that a lot of it isn't because im 'a girl' its more because im alison and 'i can take the joke', but i guess at 11 pm on a tuesday night, it really got me thinking.

quite seriously, as a girl what should i be?

(YES tapeworms, thats disgusting)

ive always been an anti-feminist to a point, that i believe that there are things that guys should do , and things that girls should do.

i relax in the fact that, i can seriously do whatever course i want in uni and not really worry about money because ill never be the breadwinner of the family, that ill have a husband to rely on.

but hearing all those jokes about 'what are you doing alison.. get back to the kitchen'

'shut up alison and make me a sandwich"

"a man ran over his wife, whose fault was it? the mans because they shouldn't drive in the kitchen" really makes me think.

what is the role of women, because i reckon i grew up thinking "everything guys can do, girls can do, AND MORE because we can have kids" 8D

and thinking that there is complete equality between women and men.

but that doesn't feel all that true.

sometimes i do feel that, we are suppressed, possibly not on purpose by men. but we are?

that as a girl i should practise the 'seen but not heard" to just "sit and look pretty"

which, especially for me is quite hard.

i dont' know, this blog post made so much more sense in my head compared to now, i really dont' know where this is heading either.

i guess i had a kind of identity crisis. like. what do guys think our 'role' is?

*shrug*

dadd....

2010-08-04T19:35:00.002+10:00

scene ; im in my room, dad is in the study, we are both working

dad; ALISON ALISON ALISON ARE YOU BUSY?

me; umm.. im working, but okay

dad; nah its okay..

* i come to him anyway*

dad; look at this picture.. its me when i was a kid!

me; thats.. cool...

dad; hmm i wonder who this kl wong person is.

me; dadd.... its your mum!!!!..

so now my (like.. actually WHOLE family) has facebook

even my grandma who is nearly 80.

lol.. isn't the wong family updated :]]]

think of it as personality analysis.

2010-07-25T17:29:00.003+10:00

1) You are walking in the woods. You see an animal. What kind of animal is it? A bear.

2) What interaction takes place between you and the animal? I run behind a tree and hope it goes away

ANALYSIS.

1) The size of the animal is representative of your perception of the size of your problems in your life.

2) The severity of the interaction you have with the animal is representative of how you deal with your problems.

lol. GG.

i commented to danli that i use those two words excessively as though im actually a gamer.

I STILL DON'T GET IT

2010-07-23T01:40:00.005+10:00

so i read this on sam's tumblr

and i always thought it was a joke

like.. to make ppl look like idiots

so the joke was like, you see this picture and go OMG I SEE IT I SEE IT

and noobs like me will go WHERE WHERE WHERE WHERE

and look like idiots moving and turning their screens

and then you can laugh at us noobs.

but turns out it is actually real.

at first i didn't believe it

JexL - ipod touch screen shattered in my eye gg says:

*so youve never seen wat it actually is

*LOL

*just tilt screen back

*its ridiculously right there!!!!

*LOL

*try different angles

*got it????

no i replied

so i went to joseph

JoeC says:

*ull c it

*if u look at it right

*lol

*it worked so fast for me

*tilt it back so its facing the ceiling?

- hArLo iTz aLo;; is trapped in a bottomless pit of homework [1/11] says:

*i have

JoeC says:

*lol

*then i dno y u cant c it

nor did i,

determined to see if there was something wrong with me, i went to charles

- Charles says:

*LOL

i can't (see it)

*haha

and i was like

YAY OMG IM NOT THAT STUPID YAY WE ARE BOTH NOOBS TOGETHER!

~a while later~

*i see it

*omg

*i just saw it

*haha

*i'm not kidding

me >.>

so obviously something was wrong with me.

jeremy couldn't believe it either, and frustratedly told me

JexL - ipod touch screen shattered in my eye gg says:

*ok stuff this

*im taking a picture

*of my tilted screen

*check your email

and this is the picture he sent me

labelled 'fail'

so now i know what im meant to see

but i couldn't get it on my own computer

so ultimately

i fail.

LOL story of my life.

all i have to do.. is dream~

2010-07-20T23:58:00.005+10:00

my title is such a lie. but its a song

its like

I love you so and that is why
Whenever I want you, all I have to do is
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam, dream, dream, dream

but as joseph found out ;

JoeC:

wth
your dreams are so weird

for example?

1) i had a dream i was pregnant with daniel radcliffe's son

2) i had a dream my friend had a lesbian lover and they killed each other right in front of my eyes

and i just stood there and after a few minutes checked if they were dead. and they were. and im like 'oh ok'

JoeC:

wth
lesbian lovers
you weird kid

3) i have killed another friend in my dreams three times.

i have shot him, poured sulphuric acid on him and pushed a shelf on him which killed him as well

each time i tell him he is like ">.> why do you hate me so much?' hehe.

- hArLo iTz aLo:

haha
i can keep on going

JoeC:

ahhh
dus it get worse?

yes it does

4) i had a dream i was at this sushi train only it was like.. enlarged heaps and instead of sushi they served dead people. and i was stealing their jewellery ....

JoeC:

yea
thats weird
rlly weird

but my favourite dream i remember is...

5) ok so i was at a cruise ship

and inside the cruise ship there was a Colosseum, like the ones they have in gladiator times

and in the Colosseum, there were prisoners chained to these poles

and then these girls came out in like spartan outfits with large swords and began slicing off the limbs of these prisoners one by one

like off goes the arm, the leg, etc etc and the finally the leg

and blood was everywhere

and i was watching with vin diesel and i was amused.

JoeC:

lol....
wth...

i think by this time i have very much have scared joseph

- hArLo iTz aLo:

haha
yehh
my dreams are actually quite concerning the more i think about it

JoeC:

its ok
they are just dreams

- hArLo iTz aLo:

but
it shows what im thinking
which is..
dead people

JoeC:

u think of deadpeople

- hArLo iTz aLo

..
i don't think thats normal
myb tonight u will dream bout dead people
since we are talkin bout it now

JoeC:

lol!!
i hope not
i hope i dream about better stuff

actually talking about dreams

SOMEONE WATCH INCEPTION WITH ME!

was planning to watch it tomorrow but it doesn't come out till the thursday!

its is about a thief who enters the dreams of others to obtain information that is otherwise inaccessible, like secrets

and it has REALLY GOOD GRAPHICS , well it is from the same director as the director from the Dark Knight and even though i didnt' really enjoy that movie, im sure this one will be AMAZING.

so anyone interested for a movie date *seedy grin*

HEHE yes im asking you out :]]]]

nam shi doon

2010-07-18T23:38:00.001+10:00

so what is nam shi doon you might ask?

well james will tell you that 'nam shi doon means anything you want it to mean!"

huh? well the story of nam shi doon goes a bit like this

so one day the boys were listening to a korean song

and they decided to sing along to it, and the best lyric they liked was 'nam shi doon'

so they decided to look up the romanised lyrics of the song, but couldn't find nam shi doon ANYWHERE

so ultimately nam shi doon became whatever you wanted it to mean

e.g.

- woah man thats awesome, that is soo nam shi doon (to express joy)

- gosh that sucks, that is soo nam shi doon (to describe something that sucks)

- yeh.. nam shi doon.. (to express agreement)

but i don't think its only the phrase 'nam shi doon' which 'mean anything you want it to mean'

i think everything in the world has differing PERSPECTIVES.

and it can mean anything you want it to mean

examples?

i remember when a parent didn't let her daughter read harry potter because she saw it as devil worship where as i think many of it just see it as a fictional novel.

or those people who think that hugging someone from the 'front' is inappropriate and instead we should adopt the 'Christian side hug?'

as i sometimes say 'it means something if you want it to mean something"

once again this is some sort of random thought process post which i felt like posting up because my blog seemed a little empty

and i dont know how to nicely conclude this post.

except that.. iono.

everyone has differing opinions and i guess it is unwise to force your ideals onto someone else.

and adversely when someone does express their differing opinion, don't get all defensive quickly but learn to listen and if you don't believe in it, then say so calmly? i guess we can all learn to do that. i fail in doing that as well. the power of saying 'ok' it amazing.

so yeh

maybe ill end it like that :]

iono here is ditto because i thought it kind of symbolises something that is everything you want it to be

photodump

2010-07-12T19:51:00.001+10:00

but in a sense.

it puts me at a sense of calm? rather than my usual flurry of a gazillion thoughts flying around my head

now im just stuck on this one constant thought

you.

ultimately ,

yom.

please don't run away yet.

2010-07-11T18:36:00.000+10:00

an observation

2010-07-10T01:22:00.003+10:00

so right now im writing notes for belonging

and ive come to an observation whilst stalking many blogs

basically,if you have a blog, then chances are ive read most of your posts. because thats what i do with my time which i should be spending studying, or reading the bible and doing quiet time (anna had a talk about idols and i ashamedly realised how many i have)

and my observation is that

everyone who has a blog obviously uses their blog to ... express themselves

no my observation is more than that

its like.. all bloggers seem to be into being into 'indie' things

i don't know how to explain it, but ill try to draw some characteristics

out of all the bloggers i stalk;

1) they are all into songs that aren't mainstream. and usually its like.. that genre where its a little quirky, like a little quirky girl singing in a little quirky way with little quirky music in the background. either that or classical music.

2) they all have similar fashion sense? like vintage. it seems like all bloggers are into vintage. whether it is going to op shops to find good bargains (which i assume everyone likes) or like, ripped stockings (which basically everyone knows i don't like.. ew.. ladders), or having an old demin vest or a nice big sunhat. i find that a lot of people are into like.. beige kind of, pastel colours? like.. where the models are always next to a stack of hay with mellow lighting.

by the way, i LOVE this guy. he is wearing his cardigan backwards and i love how it fits him so well

im going to buy an oversized cardigan which looks good back to front as well :]

3) they all have a specific way of writing. i don't know because i dont' write anywhere near their style. whether or not it is deep and sentimental or just plain blunt and simple.

4) they are all into reading. reading those classics which i hate. about like.. women sewing and men riding horses. the books which take 500 pages to basically say "boy meets girl and they fall in love"

although, im really into 1984, is that a classic? well its well known . what makes a classic anyway? *shrug*

5) they are all into taking photos of stuff.

like.. stuff.. like.. things that i wouldn't really take photos of, e.g. a wall, a plant, a window. like its beautiful, but its strange think what these people see when they first walk into an area, OH LOOK wall :]]

and like.. i guess all these things set them apart from the mainstream. and into a community of bloggers who are into the same things, same music, they notice the same things, like to wear the same thing.

but at the same time its ironic? because they are like. all individual and stuff, but not really because they are just walking from one stereotype (teenager caught within the media frenzy) to another (blogger who is different from the teenager caught within the media frenzy)

but then, nothing is nonconformity

everything you do is kind of conforming, because i think it has come to a stage where whatever you do, someone has done it before, unless you a seriously 'out there', like lady gaga who i guess set a new precedent in what makes a good performance or a good outfit.

a note about the picture above YES it is danli,

i was like. looking around deviant art and just typed in 'conforming'

and i found sunny's picture of danli

and the comment was

so many people try to be different and not conform!! like wearing no-lens glasses!
but if we all do that... we'll be conforming...
how paradoxical ):

model: danli

which i guess is a sad thought, like.. nothing you do is really 'individual', its merely jumping from one stereotype to another

but then at the same time, you will always belong to something. which.. seems important according to this area of study.

i actually have no idea where this blog is going

obviously my blogger stereotypes are generalisations, not all bloggers are like that

i, for one, isn't really into any music, as long as it distracts me from being distracted

2) my fashion sense is basically trying to fit as many primary colours onto me, i like colours

3) my writing style is really colloquial? really simple english, you can probably hear me speak because i talk like this anyway.

4) i only read english texts because i have to

5) i never take my camera out anymore because im far too lazy to take photos (i actually had this plan of documenting every second of my life, then i gave up. lol)

yet still, i managed to keep this blog somewhat alive for nearly 2 years. wow.

when im REALLY bored i like to read back to my old posts

and its amazing how much ive changed.

maybe later ill read back to this and go 'wow. such a nub. ' actually i wont say that, because by then 'nub' wouldn't be a word commonly spoken. but you get my drift.

conflict

2010-07-06T00:20:00.002+10:00

i never thought scrubs will ever give me thoughtful relationship advice

but it does

and it was good that

i ended up watching the episode

even though my brain was screaming GO STUDY ALISON

and one of the quotes was

" Ultimately, conflict is resolved by remembering why you were friends in the first place... by swallowing your pride.In the end it doesn't really matter how you get there. As long as you're friends again."

and i guess we can all learn from that

i am a very proud person

ive had people tell me that

and my ego causes me to put up a barrier to many actions

and im stubborn enough (and often forgetful) to not think of all the good things

and i just focus focus on the bad things

and my ego makes me think 'im not going to do anything about it. if they want it, they should try instead of me"

so its good to take upon the advice of scrubs :]

but lok yun says that its not as easy as that.

that some things can't be worked out

which i guess links back to my cheesecake analogy

but even if things don't work out, relationships just die or 'dissipate into nothingness'

don't cry because its finished, smile because it happened. :]]

~ ~ ~ ~>†Lük¥Øn†<~ ~ ~ ~ says:

*awwww so deep alison

*:)

I KNOW RIGHT? yay

totally in love with tim c's natural talent of getting numbers

i just replay and replay and rofl and rofl and rofl LOL.

an analogy

2010-07-01T22:40:00.004+10:00

do you know what you are like?

you, my friend, are like cheesecake.

the bestest cheesecake ever

the ones with the perfect biscuit base

chilled to perfection

with lovely cheesy goodness..

but cheesecake. has an expiry date

and no matter how much i LOVE cheesecake.

after its expiry date,

the more i have.

the worse its effect has on me.

eventually one day ill have to face the fact,

that ill have to

put you down. and say goodbye.

sometimes love just aint enough.

omg. shoes

2010-06-30T18:06:00.002+10:00

something is wrong with this picture
but i just can't point out what it is... :S

how much is that doggy in the window ?

so like, we all have to clean anyway

so we might as well make it easier :]

to be or not to be

2010-06-26T13:34:00.002+10:00

thinking about studying law.

so basically ive set all my goals and dreams in getting that atar to get into law.

and when people go 'what do you want to do in uni'

i chuckle to myself and say "law"

and then they say 'what if you don't get in'

this is when i respond 'i don't know.. ill break down and cry?'

i guess i get quite a few negative responses to doing law

1) im too nice

i don't know if this is a compliment or a stake (steak) in my heart [only charlotte would get that joke]

like, thankyou for saying im nice. but you just cutting down my one and only dream?

it kind of concerns me because i know im quite a cruel and mean person. i make the effort to be nice i guess. it doesn't come naturally.

people say that in uni im just going to get pwned by all the bitches who can stand up for themselves, and i'll let myself be used and owned.

2) im noob at arguing

i used to be proud of arguing i think

i think i used to be a little hot headed

anything that i didn't agree with ill fight till the death

i used to be proud of my poison tongue

but then something changed. and i started hating it.

yes i hate arguing. i seriously do.

talking to darren i've realised that by avoiding arguments. i guess i tell a bunch of lies.

lies?

yeh. you know all the inspirational stuff about 'tell the truth, it doesn't matter what people think" or "the truth is always the best" etc etc etc....

i guess i know that? but whether or not i believe in it is another issue

i think these days im so caught up in being that nobel peace prize winner

making everyone happy

that ive kind of lost my own voice? and the advice i give is reflective to what the person WANTS to here. not what i believe?

example?

well when katie was crying in lunch. she was like "oh im such a crybaby" and i was like 'ever since we were born, crying wasn't a weakness, it was a sign that we were alive"

but personally, when i cry. i feel weak.

so how am i going to become a lawyer when i don't even make an effort to speak out my own opinions? im just that multi-faceted diamond which reflects whatever you want to hear. i don't stand for my values.

i don't even know what they are.

3) im christian

so i was reading hannah's blog and she wrote

at NextGen i was talking to some SWITCH leaders and we were discussing the significance of university courses in regards to which is better in serving God and glorifying Him. the girls both agreed that it’s not so much the course that you pick but the attitude that you adopt which matters. i could be a lawyer and still as faithfully witness to my future colleagues as a social worker would. this is the essence of what i’m trying to put forth.

" i could be a lawyer and still". sounds like being a lawyer is seen as one of the most unglorifying jobs out there , the way she worded it.

i was talking to tammy and she was saying how before she entered the course there were tonnes of people who made her feel like, just doing the course was a sin. and i know its not. but hollywood has made lawyers into backstabbing, arguing cruel people who will participate in lucrative and unlawful practises in order to win a case and get the money.

i know that it shouldn't really stop me, i know that there are christian lawyers out there. i know that i can still can glorify his name .but i also know the avenue for christian lawyers is so narrow and im not even lawyer material so wouldn't that make it even HARDER for me?

like its not a job like nursing or doctor or social worker where people go 'oh cool, you can really glorify the Lord with that occupation" its more like "ahh .. well you still can glorify God in a way?'

and finally

4) im not smart enough

i think this is what i tell myself.

feels like im failing school.

ultimately i don't want to become a lawyer. i just want a law degree? i actually don't know what i want to do with it. i just figured that with a law degree it will probably be easier to enter the UN.

and i don't want to do anything else.

so who said vuvuzela's were annoying?

2010-06-25T19:57:00.001+10:00

people on facebook; here is the link http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xB0pS3rPbwA&playnext_from=TL&videos=R-ZPOJiP9ag&feature=sub

enjoy :]]]]

goodbye k-rudd

2010-06-25T02:03:00.002+10:00

oh krud.. k-rudd is gone (sorry i JUST HAD to make that reference)

and to be honest, ill miss k-rudd

1) ill miss his hairstyle

i asked dad if he could get that hairstyle next time

he said he will try. :]

i think after he has gone

i have a small crush on kevin rudd like..

HE IS SOO CUTE? LIKE.. OMG!!! i just want to... pinch his cheeks and go.. *who is the cute one.. yes YOU are the cute one.. oh yes OH YES!*

2) ill miss his asian-ness

i loved how he was more asian than me

3) ill miss calling him K-RUDD MY HOMIE.

so what to call julia? julz?

you julz WELCOME TO THE CRIB YO!

the story behind this photo.

so joey decided to crash my house for the day

and we were bored at my house

so we were on msn and were like 'cool tim is online'

so we were like 'hi tim, are you at home'

and he was like '... yes i am'

us 'OKAY WE WILL BE THERE IN 10 MINS'

and we just randomly crashed his house

and raided his wardrobe going WHAT'S THIS? WHAT'S THIS ? WHAT'S THIS ?

that's me with his hats (he has heaps but he doesn't wear them) and his sunnies

haha fun times ^^

just waiting.

2010-06-20T15:37:00.001+10:00

just waiting for myself to completely break down

so that i can start afresh

can't find a parking spot?

2010-06-14T11:07:00.002+10:00

just make you own :]

link for people who are viewing this on facebook.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LvLu9Nfd_SU&feature=popular

and text out of its context is a con

2010-06-13T18:09:00.002+10:00

the text;

i always thought you could do everything

i thought that every time i had a problem i could rely on you

i never thought you were so insufficient.

so useless.

so inadequate for me.

who are you anyway?

you are no better than me.

why should i still bother trying to understand you.

i wish i could say goodbye to you.

but i can't.

i hate this. i hate you...

context;

so pris asked mr saw how to do a maths question related to integration

and after a while.

he said 'sorry i don't think this can be integrated'

me and pris; WHAT.. WHY?

mr saw; not everything can be integrated. there are a million more things that can't be integrated in comparison to things that can be integrated.

me; omg. i feel so cheated. i thought integration could do everything

mr saw; it can't.

me *sad face*

this is why if i blog anything ambiguous.

don't instantly assume it is you.

i get inspired by the most random things :D

you should ask me if you are concerned XD

thats all!

(sorry for neglecting this blog.

im not going to lie

its going to happen more often with the hsc and everything)

what does BP stand for?

2010-06-05T15:04:00.001+10:00

apart from british petroleum.

Bungled Plugjob
Banish Petroleum
Better Plugit
Barack’s Problem
Beyond Pathetic
Buy a Prius

i think i like the last one the best :]]

oh well back to study

hmmm motion is killing me :[

best friends?

2010-05-29T14:58:00.003+10:00

(11:07 PM) Daniel:

girls can guys CAN be friends
but the question is
can guys and girls be BEST friends ?

well to answer that question i guess we need to define 'best friends'.

and ive come to the realisation that

a best friend is someone who you can share all your problems with without awkwardness

you can be yourself when you are with them

you know their fears, you know that passions

a best friend is someone who will help you when you are in need

someone who you are comfortable with, even in silence.

someone who wants to hear your rants. wants to hear your problems and your worries

someone you can pray with. someone you can trust with your secrets.

and it doesn't matter

how often you see them. or how often you even talk.

you don't need to know how many pairs of shoes they have. or what is their favourite flavour of ice cream.

i think a best friend is someone who is always there for you

and so now we got that defined

can guys and girls be best friends

i think so.

and yes i can hear the voices of dan, phils, kin and jd going

what what what no no no!

and yes i acknowledge that some (most) of the time there is something more than 'just friends'

and i have had a best friend where things did eventually get sour.

but i think that i have best friends who are simply just.. best friends. regardless of their gender

so yea. i would like to think that guys and girls can be best friends.

whether or not that happens with you, well thats a different matter.

day 9 - a photo my father took

2010-05-17T19:26:00.002+10:00

day 09 - a photo you took

why the super delayed post you may wonder?

well it is because i was waiting for me to be bothered to take a photo

but since i don't like my camera and use it only to take videos

and i always go with kirsten and her 20 D

and my father has a 5D

i really don't see the point of taking photos anymore.

SO INSTEAD

i shall advertise for my father. HE DOES WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHY! so if you are planning to get married anytime soon. you know who to call *wink*

here is a picture he took recently in his trip to new zealand.

its like.. really scary.. see if you guys can see the two faces in the clouds.

can you?

so yeh. back to my pdhpe assessment

and NO it is not about

muscles

or how to get buff

or how to run

it is about the health status of aboriginals and socioeconomically disadvantaged people

as well as health promotion initiatives.

i have no idea how many people have asked me what we study in pdhpe. no we don't just run around each lesson.

i love maths-love

2010-05-16T19:35:00.002+10:00

i was stalking a few friends on facebook

when i found this

who said facebook wasn't useful?

in order to get in tuned with hamlet's character

i decided to procrastinate :]]]]

Caleb (Statistics):
Oh babe.
You flip my normal distribution upside down, you change my standard deviation, varying my variance along the way.
I want to find the median of your heart, as the sample size of mine increases. I only hope you feel positively skewed about me, as we walk together, drawing median regression lines in the sand.
I know I made no standard errors when I correlated my feelings with you.

Jeff (Advanced Mathematics):
My love for you is like an asymptotic hyperbola... No matter what direction we go, it will always approach infinity. You have curves like y=x^3, and the sturdy masculinity of y=x^4, and nowhere are you near x^2 + y^2 = 1.
When you indefinitely integrate me, you are the one constant, all else are variables. Our love for one another is not just an ordinary differential equation, we are a simultaneously solved partial differential equation.
You are like the complex conjugate that completes me, with no other can I become a real number...
Without you, I am only imaginary....

day 8 - a photo that makes me sad.

2010-05-16T15:27:00.001+10:00

Day 08: A photo that makes you angry/sad

Seeing photos of my good friends
Getting totally wasted in parties
Always makes me sad :[

Sorry today is going to be short.

and no, there is no photo.

day 7 - a photo that makes me happy

2010-05-16T01:01:00.004+10:00

Day 07: A photo that makes you happy

seeing that long posts seem to be my signature blogging style

i refuse to only show you one photo that makes me happy

:] but i know you LOVE IT

(these photos are not in order, but they go from oldest to newest.

also these photos are just ones i found on facebook.)

rice oke 08!

one of the bestest most hyper group of people ive ever met

singing praises to the Lord

playing music for him

to running around sydney entertainment centre screaming

and having piggy back races

its sad that i don't talk to many of them now

but i still smile. because of all the great memories we had.

rice choir 09!

its so encouraging to see so many people so passionated about God

LOL at andy.

there are not many places where you can just walk up to someone you don't know and

just introduce yourself like that

if anyone has the chance. DEFINITELY JOIN THE RICE CREATIVE TEAM!

amazing grace 08 i think.

when me, tim, ko, kat and andrew had to blow up 200 + balloons for the kiddies

it was so much fun that day

i lead a team of girls

plus had to perform a skit which we only rehearsed once before. (great improv work by jtam)

but it was the most tiresome day !

jindy 08

getting to know both nana and kt

and getting closer to my girlies

through BOYBAND PICS!

my oh my, doesn't katie look HOT :]]] (did you know that im MARRIED to her .

thats right

be jealous. )

vienna 08

dude the best days of my life ABSOLUTELY!

i love europe >

MY GIRLIES!

this was taken at katie's christmas lunch.

we decided to take a family photo.

from right to left is;

the baby (joey), the mother (kirsten), everyone's favourite aunty (kt)

the old grandpa (cho), the always eating brother (sylv), the adopted daughter (nana)

daddy's girl (paik) and the father (ME!)

my girls always make me smile

they are people who i will make a serious attempt in keeping in contact because im so in love with all of them. its kind of homosexual.

rezza's party

how many schools in the world

can boast in HOT and SMART girls like hornsby girls

im so glad i didn't get into baulko or nsg

i wouldn't be able to meet these people :]]]

farrell's farewell party 09

although it was incredibly sad that he left (but not really coz we still see him all the time teaching tempe or something)

i smile at all of mr farrell's stories

mrs black was like 'did he even teach you? or just tell you about his life?'

best teacher ever i reckon!

ice cream day!

capos with dan nana and matt.

it was the boys first time

and LOL at dan

'noob princess ">

dfd

operation bbq 09 (number 1)

i personally like this photo more because of the comments after wards

or more like

me and lennox intense argument

Alison Wong

lennox; my name is lennox, im so tall that i don't need to jump

Lennox To

MY NAME IS ALISON

IM REALLY SHORT

SO THAT WHEN I JUMP

IM NOT EVEN AS TALL AS LENNOX

Alison Wong

my name is lennox.

im just jealous of alison's cool jump pose

Lennox To

im alison

and deep down i think that lennox is really original

cos hes not jumping in a jumpshot

Alison Wong

im lennox

i think its so original to stand

even though thats what humans do most of the time anyway.

Lennox To

im alison

ive run out of calls

so i just said something random that may or may not have anything to do with the photo

Alison Wong

im lennox

im jealous at how well alison can think of comebacks

i secretly admire her.

OH THANKS LENNOX!

Lennox To

ermm...

Lennox To

TRUCE.

Alison Wong

maybe

argument killer

nearly as bad as david the baby killer

Lennox To

nah im just a gentleman

im alison and i cant take losing an argument.

Jonathan Chun Hei Ip

OMG!!!! i love the convo!!! lolllll!!!!!

i recently realised that lennox is actually insanely smart

and i feel so mean to him. coz im really slack to him :[

matts/ lok's/ lennox's/ zil's / jeremy's baptism

i don't know what i call these group of people

i just generalise them at the 'church people'

but i seriously don't know where i will be without all these people

they are absolutely awesome

without them

i probably will never go out, because all my outings are usually involved with at least one of them.

my birthday!

it was awesome to see everyone that i love on my birthday

and how everyone treated me like a princess for the day (except tim who bruised me instead)

yay for human pyramids.

i was going to do some pdhpe but didn't that fail

seeing all these happy photos

made me forget bout my crap report

...

yeh.. i did bad in it :[

these days it is so cold

not just in terms of weather

people seem colder

my work load seems to get heavier and less interesting

and my own heart seems to be a little colder as well

i want a hug. someone to warm up everything.. :[

during band.

the two juniors next to me were busy texting their boyfriends

and i had no one. i felt.. unloved.

dnm with char

opened up.. a part of my memory which i tried to lock

its as though

i built a bridge

walked over it

burnt the bridge

but now im looking over the river to where i was before and going *sigh*

day 6 - whatever tickles my fancy

2010-05-10T20:03:00.002+10:00

Day 06: Whatever tickles your fancy

“ in all commentating upon Shakespeare there has been a radical error never yet mention. It is the error of attempting to expound his characters – to account for their actions – to reconcile his inconsistencies - not as if they were the coinage of a human brain but if they had been actual existences upon earth.

We talk of hamlet the man, instead of hamlet the dramatis persona – of hamlet that God, in place of Hamlet that Shakespeare, created. If hamlet really lived, and if the tragedy were an accurate record of his deeds, from this record we might, it is true, reconcile his inconsistencies, and settle to our satisfaction his true character.

But the task becomes the purest absurdity when we deal only with a phantom, it is not the inconsistencies of the acting man we have as a subject of discussion… but the whims and vacillations – the conflicting energies and indolences of the poet. It seems to me little less than a miracle that this obvious point should have been overlooked.” - edgar allan poe.

LOL isn’t this EXACTLY what we are doing in Hamlet right now?

Gotta love edgar allan poe to point that out. And people wonder why I want to call my kid after him. Like.. seriously. He is THE BEST

day 5 - my favourite quote

2010-05-08T17:02:00.002+10:00

Day 05: Your favourite quote

I have a few favourites. Like always.

My favourite verse in the bible is Philippians 4:13 which says ‘I can do all things through him who gives me strength” it is very encouraging to know that even if life sucks and it feels like I can’t do anything and that I have too much work to do. God will always be there and I can always confide in him YAY FOR GOD!

One of my favourite lyrics belongs to ‘we belong to the day”. I think everyone likes different parts of that song. But I love when it goes ‘the world in its turning stops, to marvel at the Son of God”. Like.. can you imagine it? When God comes along and everyone stops what they are doing to just.. go ‘wow. God is awesome”.

Another favourite lyric of mine is quite pessimistic actually. It is from ‘im not that girl’from the wicked broadway musical. It goes ‘wishing only wounds the heart’. Its my.. favourite I guess because I feel like so many times I have false hopes and I get very disappointed. So it just.. grounds me I guess? Makes sure my thoughts are… suitable.

My favourite quote from a person is when mrs whalan said “ look back but don’t stare”. I guess it encourages us that if you did something stupid. That it is important just to look and see what you have done wrong. And keep on going with life. don’t stare into your wrongs, don’t envelope yourself with self pity and ‘if onlys’ because you can never really get out of it.

And something I say to myself is “don’t venture into the land of ‘if only’, STUDY”.
Which is what im going to do now.

So cya.

I was overhearing a conversation as I was walking to roll call
It was between 2 year 8’s

It went on like this

A: hey… we are going to the ‘movies’ yea
B; I can’t! I don’t have money
A; stupid! We aren’t really going to the movies, we are just telling our parents that are going to ‘the movies’.
B; oh yea oh yea.. that should be fun! Be at my house at 8pm!

And what makes me wonder is that
When I was in year 8, I told my parents that I was ‘studying’ so that they let me out to watch a movie
But now people in year 8 tell their parents that they are watching a ‘movie’ to.. do what?

This intrigued me for the whole day.

very interesting.. very interesting indeed...

day 4 - my favourite book.

2010-05-08T00:22:00.001+10:00

Day 04: Your favourite book

When I was starting this blog
I ended up writing my introductory paragraph like.. 5 times because I had no idea what to write.

To remember back to the days when I read books for pleasure and not for English makes my brain hurts. I don’t really put time aside to read. I usually only read on the train or waiting for friends. (seeing that I enjoy arriving at places half an hour early, and my friends enjoy arriving at places half an hour late)

But thinking back to when I was young. And still brainwashed into studying all 24 hours of the day, i remember one series that I really liked…

Presenting…

*dun dun dun dun*
DELTORA QUEST!

Yes remember that book with all the gems on the side
:]]

Doing more research on this book, I realised that there is an anime on this series. I must take time to watch when I'm done with the hsc. *puts it on my already long list of things to do *

I remember when I was younger. My mum made me read all these books such as ‘the da vinci code’ and ‘the red wall series’ because it seemed that being able to read such books was a sign of your intelligence. Like. You will hear aunties going “my daughter is SOO smart she read the whole red wall series in like.. 2 months! What does your daughter read?” and my mum will mumble out something along the lines of “ she likes… to read.. about nature?”

Which I did. I used to LOVE reading encyclopaedias, I believe that’s the reason why I know so much random information about animals etc. I also believe that’s the reason why I have such a love of just.. knowing things. Just finding out about things.

Question to pose to all your blog readers. Because this is something I really really want to know.

What happens to all the fat ugly pets that no one wants in the pet shop?

I asked chelia who works in a pet shop and she says ‘they go to bondi’
And im like ‘don’t they get killed?”
And shes like ‘NOOO !! THEY GO TO LOVING HOMES’
And so I answered “bet bondi is another word for death”.

Day 3 - my favourite television program

2010-05-07T18:07:00.004+10:00

Day 03: Your favorite television program

I know this post is delayed
I can’t believe I used to be able to blog every single day. It takes up so much time!

Anyway.
I love watching tv.
Anyone who knows me, knows that I watch too much tv and youtube
Some people go ‘how can you not fail your subjects and still watch tv?”

Well. I kind of structure my whole study timetable around things I would like to watch. It motivates me to watch tv. :]

So I like to classify my tv shows under the days they air on tv. (im soo glad we don’t have foxtel or tvbj at home because if we did.. I will be glued on the tv)

So. Sunday.

On Sunday there are quite a few good shows on.

Talking about your generation - I don’t care about what anyone says about how annoying the host is. Or how the jokes aren’t funny. I love it! I love Josh Thomas! (the guy who is the team leader of gen Y)

The good wife – due to charlotte’s influence, I really really want to be a wife. I want to be someone who people comment ‘man. She is a good wife’. And in this film, the main character is definitely good. Not only is she a wife, she is also a mother and a LAWYER! Plus. I admire her .. ability to tackle her husbands public affair so well. I would not know how I will cope if my husband cheated on me.

House – I used to love this show so much that I was planning to become a doctor. Yet I came to my senses and realised that I will never be smart enough to be able to cut open people’s bodies and.. pull things out. ( my idea of a surgeon). But I love how smart house is. And I love the relationship between him and Wilson. BROMANCE!

On Monday I don’t really watch tv.

On Tuesday I watch

i don't like how mcgee's hand in on ziva's leg so awkwardly.

i don't like how gibbs is just 'on the side'

i don't like how anthony is slouching making him look fat.

but i love abby's dress!

NCIS- I think ive been watching this show for 3 years straight. Even though all the ‘twists’ are really predictable. And the murders are getting more and more mundane and boring. But.. I still love it. I think I have some sort of attachment to all the characters. With ALL OF THEM! (I wish Ziva and Anthony would get together. They are soo meant to be!)

On Wednesdays I watch

Criminal minds – I used to not be able to watch it because it was on the same time as house. But channel ten has kindly moved house so that I can watch BOTH criminal minds and House. Why thankyou, channel 10. that was nice of you. I consider watching all these crime shows as part of my legal studies research. :] I usually ask Mrs black about the cases when I get to school the next day. She reminds me that its just tv, not real life.

On Thursdays I watch….

Flashforward! – This has got to be my favourite show out of all the ones I watch. Each episode leaves me speechless. Each episode makes me go WHAT. Each episode makes me go NO WAY! But for some reason it is doing really bad in the ratings. I think it is a show kind of like LOST. You have to watch it from the beginning in order to understand the whole thing. Its not a come and go like… everything else I watch. You need commitment to watch this.

I have written over one page on the shows I like. Why can’t I write this much in essays? Grr. Oh well. Whoever read this far. .. you are awesome.

day 2 - my favourite movie

2010-05-04T17:28:00.002+10:00

my favourite movie?

hmm joseph asked me this question like.. 2 nights ago and i couldn't really give him an answer.

i think i like.. gore.

but im not into seeing human being sliced into pieces,

i much rather see monsters or other fantasy beings getting slaughtered.

such as aliens, or zombies

so 2 movies that i quite enjoy include 'i am legend' and 'alien vs predators"

but if i was to borrow a dvd to watch at home.

me and my dad are able to watch it in half the time

you might ask 'woah.. really? only chuck norris can do that!"

well you see, we just skip to all the action bits

and then at the end we complain about how there was absolutely no plot and how it wasn't a good movie

and mum will be like 'OF COURSE! YOU SKIPPED HALF THE MOVIE!"

but that is no excuse for a bad movie.

surprisingly i really don't like comedic movies

i like movies which make me think as well.

for example, after shutter island. i thought about the plot for a while and the definition of what makes someone mad.

i love movies which make me cry. after a cry in a movie, i feel very satisfied.

but .. the movie im never ever sick of is ...

"pride and prejudice"

mr darcy !

makes year 12 english just a little bit more bearable.

i know its the typical cliche love story

but you see this was the FIRST cliche love story :D

today we had a deep discussion on smiley faces.

joey enjoys making her smileys like this (:

when kirsten is lazy, her smileys are like this =]

katie likes making them :D

nana likes making them like =)

and i like making them like this :] , which katie hates because shes like 'WHO THE HELL SMILES LIKE THAT?!?!?!?'

(by the way i read bron's tumbler to see what she wrote, and woah.. he writing style is soo sophiscated, so mature so journalistic. and mine is just an unplanned progression of thoughts which hover around a random topic) :[

day 1 - my favourite song

2010-05-03T17:57:00.003+10:00

i think bron started this and since im into conforming and peer pressure, i decided to do the same :]

my favourite song?

that is a hard one.

i have a few, depending on my mood i think.

miyavi - girls be ambitious

i was a massive fan of this guy for ages

i don't care if you reckon he can't sing/ can't act/ looks like a girl

hehe.. yehh.. my favourite song when im feeling angry.

phil collins - against all odds

i heard this song by pure accident when i was awake for once as i was going to school

it was on the radio

and i really like the lyrics

aerosmith - i don't want to miss a thing

i always choose this song when im going to K

its such a sweet song

im going to get him to sing at my wedding MARK MY WORDS!

just hope he doesn't die before then :S

i love the live version. it feels like he has so much more passion when he sings

but in the mv. there is a part when the girl walks into a hall

and the hall lights up

and in all the seats there are people playing like. an instrument

that is soo romantic! omg! wouldn't that be the best wedding proposal? to have a full orchestra just surround you? (the answer is yes)

hmm thats all i think..

off to do.. english >.>

my awesome business proposition

2010-05-02T16:58:00.003+10:00

so while i was doing my 4 unit homework

and checking for solutions for a questions i couldn't get.

my business studies brain suddenly switched on as i realised a really really good business opportunity.

now i don't know if you guys know, but those solutions are 50 DOLLARS PER CHAPTER

which is quite overpriced if you ask me

so now im going to start a business called 'alison's solution '

which is very unethical but profitable.

so the plan is this

1) distract nana / kenny / hilary and steal their book

or ask nicely if you could look over their book in a free or something

2) photocopy their working out

3) publish it for.. $45 dollars :]

and everyone would want to buy from MY business rather than the severly overpriced solutions. and ill make it pretty by making it all blue and stuff.

and ill be rich!

yay!

so.. who's in? :]]]]]

$$$

looking back.

2010-05-01T23:11:00.000+10:00

maybe.

hottest thing ever

2010-05-01T01:14:00.000+10:00

sorry i just believe that the above picture is one of the hottest things ive ever seen.

*drool*

and i had to share it with you guys.

its the small things

2010-04-30T20:17:00.002+10:00

small things that make my day;

- white chocolate

- my hair being co operative.

- walking back home with the setting afternoon sun as it shines on the yellowing autumn leaves making them look like they are made out of gold

- when you start a conversation and you make an effort in keeping it going

- people who wait for me after my lessons

- stringers cheese

- looking back on happy memories.

- finding things you lost

- finishing an exercise in maths

- crossing off things off a list

meeting hannah's little brother made my day .. lol. he is quite the character.

end of the holidays

2010-04-19T21:20:00.004+10:00

so even though these holidays i have done absolutely no study

i believe these holidays were extremely fun

possibly because i didnt' do any study ><

from eating sausages with the church gang

or making pizza with lyc

or devouring free ice cream with the ice cream gang.

or blue cupcakes especially dedicated to me! thanks kirsten ^^

or having breakfast in the city with Maybelle, Ivy, Jos and Lael.

from admiring the singing from the musical WICKED

or appreciating anthony's cool shoes,

not believing mick's skill on Wii

and cheering for the guys in soccer!

dancing in my super high heels at alice's party,

encouraged by the baptism of Zil, Lenny, Lok Yun, and Matt

reminded by the talk from the BHCAC Gospel night

scared by Shutter Island

tanked it out in human pyramids

screamed and shouted during a game of articulate

and laughing uncontrollably in my birthday dinner at Sushiya :]

thankyou for making my holidays AWESOME

now its back to school >.>

3 am conversations

2010-04-08T11:43:00.004+10:00

so yesterday my friend told me;

i think you should just get over him

hes not worth your thoughts

or your attention.

need help finding your other half?

2010-04-03T02:23:00.002+11:00

so i was like to lok

me" do you think that your future wife is usually somewhat similar to your own mother?"

and he was like

him "yup, according do the psychology course i am doing,

this may freak you out

but at a young age children have a desire for intimacy with their mum/dad (depending on gender)

and when you realise you can't have that intimacy

you look for it in others

most of the the time you'll find someone close to your mum/dad because they were the onew sho you first felt intimate with

but if you are rejected by one side of your parents

then in the future you are more likely to feel hostile to that gender

in a case we've studied

a guy was constantly rejected by the mum

and he ended up hating women when he grew old

and mistreating them. "

so.. i guess if you need to figure out your type

or what you look for in a guy/girl

just look at your parents. :]]]

i remember telling that to evan

who was like

YUKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK EWWWWWWWWWWWWWW NOOOO WAYYYYYYY AM I EVER GOING TO MARRY ANYONE LIKE MY MUM THAT IS SO INTENSELY GROSS!

if you are wondering YES I DO HATE THE COLOUR ORANGE

but lok always types in that colour

so ill sacrifice it for him.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

on another side note

ive realised i have absolutely no social skills

*after hearing jeremy go ' u asked me that before", "we talked about that before" etc etc

i went

me ; you make it sound like you remember every conversation we had

jerm i do

me ; thats a lie! what was our first convo about then?

i actually have no idea so you can lie to me about this

jerm ; im sure we argued in our first convo about academics stuff, i think it was tutoring

me ; what no way

jerm; no joke i remember we argued

me; why would i argue to some random

jerm; and im like 'wth ok me and this person wont get along LOL

OMG WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME

i have like

absolutely no social skiills

was i like friggen retarded. do i argue with everyone the first time i meet them

i must make the worst first impression

what was jerm thinkin talking to me again.

omg.

youtube vid

2010-04-01T22:25:00.000+11:00

thanks daniel

giftlists

2010-03-29T18:31:00.004+11:00

don't you hate it

when its someone's birthday and when you ask them what they want

they say something like

-give me your brain

-give me the the collection of kennys, nana, priscilla, alexa brain and replace it with mine

- give me a high atar

and im like 'sure... ok" and then have to continue worryin about what to get for them..

but i enjoy making life easy

im a easy going sort of girl

so here is a list of what will be nice

- my usb broke! and so another one will be nice. i do like the colour blue.

- white chocolate! YOM YOM YOM

- hair curler. a fat ish one. like. 25 mm coz my other one is a little too small

- im really obsessed with the colour of dark blue. ive been trying to find a nice dark blue nail polish for ages

- michael buble albums! :]]]

- cake!

- perfume

- your time :D

does anyone else go YAY when they see a event invitation and then when they click it they realise it is something stupid like 'HUG AN ASIAN DAY' or 'HUG A SHORT PERSON DAY'

and disappointingly you click back to the home page

and continue stalking people with better lives than you

or sees they have a new email

and then click excitedly.

and you realise its just spam :[

so about life.

2010-03-26T02:31:00.006+11:00

i wanted to blog about something
really deep and meaningful about life..

and then i found i have all these pictures in my folder labelled random internet wins
they are basically stuff from fail book, fail blog, strangely specific etc etc.

and was like

meh ill write something deep and meaningful later.

sometimes life has given you a stop sign

and you don't know where to go.

literally.

is anyone else tempted to draw a moustache on their book.

i was.

was i tempted to read a book.

nuh. not really

but if i ever saw a book with that inside

i will make sure ill read every single word

its funny because thats actually what it translates into

but its like..

welcome home.

the go is like

the actual arrival of the house.

funny!

because usually its either one of the other you know.

yes nana, the world will still survive without you.

different priorities

what are they shooting?

my dad is so the type of guy

who will go to anything to take a good photo

this guy reminds me of my dad

OMG LIFE CHANGING

my mum was saying how

in maths she had a diagram she couldn't understand for ages

and then when she had to hand it in.

she turned the page

and was like

OMG I UNDERSTAND THE QUESTION

but that was when

she was handing it in.

so today for 3 unit she was like

WHEN THERE IS A DIAGRAM.. LOOK AT IT IN ALL DIRECTIONS

me; mum.. its integration and differentiation. there are no diagrams

mum ; YOU NEVER KNOW!

haha how the japanese view the situation i assume.

i just hope that if i die

i will be remember more than my taste in plants.

that is something i would do

once i was hanging up the clothes in the backyard.

and the construction workers from next door were talking

and one of them said something really funny

so i burst into laughter

and they both looked at me. moved to the other side and started whispering.

yeh >.> no one likes me.

so people complained about MY nails being long.

im so going to do that one day.

do not be emo if no one wants to sit next to you

keep hopes up

there is always the next station.

that guy is like

HELL YEA I SAW THIS DOOR FIRST!

i hope that was ...laughter inducing

omg.

2010-03-23T22:41:00.001+11:00

omg.

i dont' understand ANY of world order crap /junk

how the HELL am i meant to right a stupid damn essay about this stupid thing

late nights with alison = hearing alison swear to herself about her stupidity/lazyness. OH FUN

T.T business studies.

2010-03-23T17:39:00.003+11:00

my failure of business studies

makes me feel like a failure.

my plan of making all my other subjects an extreme win

is quickly going down the drain

coz i can't study at all...

im just thinking about my failure

and yes this is when mrs whalan and pris will go

LOOK BUT DON'T STARE

but i can't help it. :[[[[

hottest thing ever

2010-03-22T16:46:00.002+11:00

so.
my secret fangirl obsession is.

[its a youtube vid for ppl on facebook]

isn't he like
the hottest thing ever??

many years i have tried to deny my deep obsession for him
but it was all useless..

i love you nishikido ryo. <3333333333333333333

FANGIRLLLLLLLLLLLLL

loneliness

2010-03-21T21:47:00.003+11:00

somedays

i feel that extreme pang in the heart.

that no amount of blue

or turtles

or chocolate

or cheesecake

or tv

or youtube.

can seem to get away

loneliness.

the fact that no longer do i have someone to come to at the end of the day

to talk to. about the day

about the things i thought

about the things that happened to me.

about all the small things that made my day

or hear about what they have on their mind.

how their day was

some people call it being independent

i call it being lonely.

there is a difference between being alone and lonely

you can be in a room filled with people

and still feel lonely

and you can be alone

and feel contented.

and sometimes it feels like

im in that room filled with people

people willing to learn about my day

about what is on my mind

but that pang in my heart

still remains.

because i know

that the person i am looking for

in that room

is not there.

ah damn another ambiguous post eh

i made myself promise that i wont post anymore of these.

sorry.

date or no date? that is the question

2010-03-21T00:24:00.004+11:00

the formal deposit is due soon.

and every girl is faced with the question

'to bring a date or not'

and then

all of sudden

i realised

i had no one.

and things change so much

in like.. a year.

especially this year.

because you need to find that friend

who you are close enough to be comfortable around with

and comfortable enough that it isn't awkward if people think you guys are going out

and close enough to know that you guys are ONLY friends

and that is pretty close.

and i doubt i can find anyone like that.

so the question still persists.

buy one or two tickets??

understanding alison

2010-03-18T17:29:00.004+11:00

so i get told that i am very cold over msn

so here is

the guide to understanding alison on msn.

'hey'

if i start a conversation with you

with the word 'hey'

it usually means that

i feel like talking to you, but i dont' really have anything to say. i just want to say hi.

so don't ask me 'sup'

coz ill have nothing to say

because if i had something to say i wont just say 'hi'

ill state like. what i had to say.

'lol'

this is like.. 2 seconds of laughter

like mildly amusing

'haha"

is when im smiling

'HAHAHAHAH lol that is so funny "

is when im actually laughing

'haha ok'

im never laughing when i say this

BUT

'haha *next line* ok"

is when im laughing 'haha'

and then ok. is like" lol if you say so. "

' nah its fine"

its not fine.

'w/e"

means ceebs

like.. i can't be bothered to continue with my train of thought

so ill end it midway

'ok whatever.'

used when im super pissed

when i say this

you should say 'sorry'

or find out

why im pissed.

the full stop is very important.

'NUUU WORRRRRIESSSSS!'

i basically say this whenever i can.

its like..'no problemo at all '

and is when

im super duper happy

'dw'

don't worry

means that i

was talkin bout something

that only i understand

and i cbs to

reword it into terms that you would understand

'nah its nothing . dont' worry'

yes it is true

it does mean

that you should worry your arse off

'oh. ok'

its kind of like

i don't know what to say in response to your statement

but ill respond so that u know im here

thats all i can think of for the moment

ill add more.

things to look forward to after these half yearlys

2010-03-14T23:17:00.005+11:00

so at approximately 3 am last night/this morning

not understanding maths

[its bad coz once i get to a question i don't get. i give up.even if the rest seem pretty simple]

i devised a list.

called

things alison is looking forward to after these half yearlys / my motivation to study

a high ATAR --> a law degree --> becoming a lawyer--> working for the UN :]
a car and a year's worth of petrol
church camp
having one less thing to say 'if only' to
respect - people will no longer think im some asian dumb bimbo
no disapproving sighs from passing aunties
facilities day at joey's
getting my new hair colour in the holidays [red-brown with blonde streaks!]
autumn holidays where i can chillax and read my 4 books i want to read
the autumn leaves where the girlies can play around in.
getting married if God willing
being like 100 and looking back to these days and going 'my oh my. those were fun days'
my birthday
going to HK
going to UNI
my coloured contacts
lyc theme night. ive been to lyc since i was in year 8 and THIS IS MY FIRST THEME NIGHT. [first and last actually *sad face* ]
chillaxing with the boyz OH NUUUUUU WORRRRRRRIESSSSSSSSSSSSSS
getting my own house which is all going to be BLUE
heaven :]

i don't know why

but today i was soo excited bout heaven.

i was like. imagining how awesome it will be.

inspirational! at its finest!

2010-03-02T23:31:00.002+11:00

my maths teacher has quite inspirational quotes

and when she says them

she manages to get the usually rowdy / tired/super hyper 4 unit maths class of hg

to go so quiet

you can hear a [bobby] pin drop (yes me and nana have tried it)

so yesterday she was like

"look at your past, but don't stare at it"

and we were like 'huh? what do you mean? whilst we were all stressing about how bad we ruined our opportunities in having a successful career due to our failed english assessment

and shes like

'look at your past, so you can learn from your mistakes, but don't stare at it so you can't move forward"

i think everyone can get something out of that.

it scary because just yesterday i was thinkin bout our conversation

me; hows your dog

you; i don't really want to talk about it

me; errmm okay.... :S

oh NUU WORRIES!

strong?

2010-02-26T00:47:00.006+11:00

[c=45]~ ~ ~ ~>Łμk¥øn™<~ ~ ~ ~†Jesus All About Life†·$0[/c] says:

you're so strong

i wish i was like you

i feel so weak compared to everyone else..

ive realised that people seem to think that a lot bout mewhich is.. scary.

there is a difference between strong and emotionally barren
and sometimes i just feel like im just emotionally barren
desensitized by the things ive seen , the things ive experienced

or am i just incredibly good at acting like a durian.
hard exterior on the outside but soft and squishy on the inside.
and once someone knows how to get past that hard shellim totally vulnerable

or do i just show weakness in another form that people have yet to understand ??

wow i can't believe it.. i thought you were strong!

chloe ng.

yeh im just like everyone else.

the church asked if i was an ice cream what kind of ice cream would i be ?

i said i would be like rainbow ice cream because everyone thinks im some crazy exciting girl with no problems in the world. but when they come closer they realised im just plain old ordinary vanilla ice cream.

go to hell?

2010-02-20T11:22:00.005+11:00

once mr farrell was like
'yeh im definitely going down to hell".

and people say 'go to hell' i hope you 'die in hell'.
i remember that i used to type in 7734506. which when typed into your calculator
spells 'go 2 hell'

but do people actually understand what hell is?
is it something that people go 'hell? yeh thats an undesirable place but its inevitable'

what is hell?

well the media says that hell looks a little bit like this

which is probably from the verse " if anyone's name was not found written in the book of life, he was thrown into the lake of fire"

but last night simeon was like 'hell might not really be just about physical pain of fire, at the time revelations was written, being burned alive was the worst imaginable pain in the world. "

basically hell is just a place of extreme pain and not just physical but emotional, physiological, spiritual.

but then simeon also said later 'someone said hell is like sitting in a movie theatre by yourself and watching a blank screen, and not being able to leave. it is just extreme loneliness and helplessness."

kirsten once told me that 'hell is living without God. and well for non believers, thats what they are already doing i guess'

thats all.

girls will be girls

2010-02-17T00:41:00.002+11:00

愛 -jK- Mons†er [30] said:

why are you guys

complicated

u have to care about STUPID things

and do STUPID things

and think STUPIDLY

its so hard to understand

OMG

sorry

that was like

a bit

offensive

jono's opinion of girls

and to be honest he is completely true

we care about stupid things

thinking about all of the things i was pissed at

i look at myself and i see myself doing the same thing.

like that proverb about seeing the speck in someone's elses eye but not being able to see the plank in your own.

and looking back now

they were pretty stupid. but late night angst make you do crazy things.

we do stupid things.

like.

expecting them to notice me when i try to avoid them so that i feel special when they go up to talk to me

when i bagg them out and play hard to get.

and then going crazy if you do the same.

and think stupidly

yea . i do that often

[i replaced all the 'we' and 'you' with just me and i coz im pretty sure no one else does it]

reading pride and prejudice

anshul is like

WHAT ELIZABETH IS SO WEIRD IN DOING ALL THOSE THINGS

REREADING LETTERS

PLAYING HARD TO GET

AVOIDING MR DARCY TO GET HIS ATTENTION

me; umm i do the exact same thing.

anshul; WHAT ALISON IS SO WEIRD IN DOING ALL THOSE THINGS.

jono; i will never want to fall in love with you.

not a morning person

2010-02-10T23:40:00.003+11:00

this is how alison is like before school starts

she trudges her way to school.

squinting from her already small eyes which she tries to keep open

yet her single eyelids refuse to open

she avoids human contact

she walks to westfield without saying a word

she is too tired to smile

or to act interested in your lack of frees

or your assessments

or your maths homework

or to look happy to see your face.

and looks at the juniors

who have sleep unfairly bestowed on them.

and give them an envious glare,

yet making sure that ms dunn isn't there to say that im bullying them.

and she waits till her body finally decides to turn on.

my pictures aren't co operating.

fun in the rain!

2010-02-06T23:30:00.003+11:00

so today after lael's birthday dinner, it was pouring.

so me and ajay ran out and started singing

like.. we were in the rain and we broke out into song at the same time.

'i'm singing in the rain,

just singing in the rain!

what a glorious feeling

to sing in the rain!"

me; keep on going!

ajay' and i don't know.. the rest of the lyrics.

but that wont stop me from singing in the rain~!!!"

i love the rain.

walking from thall to darling harbour in the pouring rain

was so much fun. everyone hated it

except for me.

YAY-ERS!

me to lennox; OMG YOU LIED? IM TELLING JESUS! and God is going to be like LENNOX YOU ARE..... UNCOOL.

knowledge is power.

2010-02-05T22:57:00.004+11:00

Mutt Williams: I don't understand. Why the legend about the city of gold?
Indiana Jones: The Ugha word for gold translates as "treasure." But their treasure wasn't gold. It was knowledge. Knowledge was their treasure.

joey blogged about knowledge

"the power of knowledge...is it good to know more? Or to know less??."

i think i love knowing more. its just human for us to be curious isn't it?

mrs black has commented that i love learning bout the details of everything.

why? because i feel 'powerful' when i know more about that person than that person knows me

not because i can blackmail them. that is absolutely not my intention at all! its just a nice feeling. its like.. they WANT me to know these things. and that makes me very happy that they would want to tell me of these things.

i think knowledge also gives you security. you know what is going to happen or what will probably happen. it feels nice to have that stability so that i wont need to worry that much. it feels nice to know my environment because after understanding my surroundings i will be able to know what i can do.

so to answer joey's question. it is better to know more.

yes ignorance is bliss. and what you dont' know wont hurt you. but i think the insecurity of not knowing what will happen. not knowing what is happening around you, not knowing about how things work is definitely not blissful.

and if you hear about something you don't want to hear about? well in the famous words of Friedrich Nietzsche, What does not kill me, makes me stronger."

so you want to know more? jesus has answers. :]

obsessed

2010-02-02T00:54:00.002+11:00

lately i feel like ive been obsessing over my weight too much

and i don't have scales at home. i usually only find out how heavy i weigh when i go to nana's house.

aim; lose 3 kg this year? iono probably wont happen

but iono i just don't eat anymore. its kind of weird like.

yesterday i just forgot to eat

and mum came home at 9 30 pm and was like

DUDE YOU HAVEN'T EATEN YOUR LUNCH OR DINNER?

and im like 'oh. thats why i had so much time on my hands".

the urge to blog

2010-01-28T22:05:00.003+11:00

for some reason i feel the sudden urge to blog

but i don't have anything to blog about..

maybe for once ill actually blog about my life.

so whats been up?

im kind of in the camcording phase

im planning to use my camcorder more often now

project 1 - swimming carnival!

im scared that at graduation no one will have any footage of us

so .. if that happens maybe i can come to the rescue. :D

and.. i don't know. i like looking at videos more than photos. i think videos tell people the whole story more often

i have done nothing in the holidays but im kinda of chilled about that

yea i have done nothing

except for watch tennis

and sleep.

ive realised that the person ive spent the most time in the holidays is phils.

haha 11 out of 31 days.

ive realised that ive spent the most time in the holidays with the church people. but thats totes choice.

my muscles still hurt from the super hectic aussie day i had with the boyz

my legs and my arms and everything!

i don't even know why

maybe coz i had to go up and down the stairs so much from the backyard and the kitchen.

but hopefully im working out my legs

i like how this photo screams out AUSTRALIA without having any of the cliche kangaroos. or the flag or bbq or anything.

my new pdhpe teacher in the ultimate cliche of all pdhpe teachers. shes like all the pdhpe teachers fused together to make a generic pdhpe teacher

do you know how many photos i had to go through before i found my first picture of a teacher without any sexual connotations? too many.

she is called ms davenport. isn't that a brand for undies.

and yehh.. when i saw her i KNEW she was the new pdhpe teacher

coz she was wearing a casual tshirt

and 3/4 pants

and sneakers

and her hair was tied back lazily.

she seems nice.

i hope she bakes a lot of stuff :D haha yeah im THAT shallow.

i had an epic day of a one period day today

this was my mood for the whole of today!

came to school at 11 and then we had a meeting

and then we had 3rd period

in which i skipped to

and yelled out HI MRS BLACK

and shes like '.... hi.. alison'

and yeh.. during the whole of legal i was CRAVING FROZEN COKE

so once legal ended i ran into nana's class screaming NANANANNANANNANANNA I NEED FROZEN COKE NOW!

and so we walked out.

and i had my frozen coke

and decided to have some ice choc as well :D

then bought paik's present

its a blue bear called snowflake. because she gave me a white bear called bluey. hehe

yea me and nana talked nonstop for like.. 3 hours straight. thats whole we roll man! looking forward to spending the year with her. yayness!

im totally in mix 106.5 mood 24/7

potnis ; omg. congratulations you are officially 50 years old

me; why THANKS!

potnis; that was not a compliment.

this picture is called 'pokemon 50 years in the future'

pikachu is SOO CUTE! hehe

haha thats is all

things that guys don't have to do;

2010-01-23T00:43:00.003+11:00

my version;

things that guys don't have to do ;

1) condition their hair

2) blow dry their hair so long that by the time you finish blow drying your hair your whole body is sweating and you feel just as gross as before you went into the shower

3) brushing your hair

4) collect furballs around the house that consist of your hair

5) wax/ shave legs or armpits

6) pluck eyebrows

7) find something new to wear everyday

8) wear heels

9) look pretty

10) be smart but not too smart so that you feel dumb

11) paint nails

12) wear makeup

13) spend money on makeup

14) wake up early to get ready so that we look nice but then you don't even realise.

15) wear dresses and skirts

16) instantly be in charge of little kids

17) WORRY ABOUT PERIODS

18) skip meals

19) go on a constant diet

20) seeing every girl we meet and comparing our flaws with their assets.

21) make sure our make up doesn't smudge

22) keep our skin pale

23) uncomfy bras which dig into your skin

24) health concerns of hair dye / nail polish / hair spray fumes

25) burns from hair curlers and straighteners

i will stop there but i can go on forever

and the reason why we do all these crazy, stupid, expensive things

is so that you'll comment on something on something oh so small

'i like your hair'

'you look good in that dress'.

'you look pretty today'

thats all.

guys do NOT understand the power they have from simply complementing a girl

2010-01-22T00:18:00.002+11:00

i know no ones reads lyrics

but here are some anyway.

I haven't seen you
Feels like a long time
Sometimes it still hurts
But I always get by

So if I ever see you on the street
I'll pretend that I didn't see
And turn my face
No use in small talk anyways

Because if I look into your eyes
Then I'll have to say goodbye
And thatll break my heart
So I wont even start
I wont even start

I wish you luck
And I wish it true
That's the best
I can do for you

Cuz you'll probably find love
In someone new
I have to let go
Yeah it's hard to do

So if I run into you with your arm by his side
Just know it'll cut me like a knife

articulate! quotes

2010-01-20T17:59:00.002+11:00

this is post number;

but that has nothing to do with the game articulate.

what is articulate?

well its a game where they give u words and you have to describe a word to your team until they get it.

eg. if the word was pig, then i might go 'its pink and when cooked it becomes pork or bacon'

but it goes really fast and its pretty stressful and its like.. screaming because it has time limit

and if you play with me and phils we try to rig the sand timer .

so here are some funny quotes from my.. 3/4 of year which i have been playing it

QUOTE ONE

a; something that eats wood.

b; A WOODPECKER!

[it was termite]

QUOTE TWO

a; when you are pregnant you are...?

b; FAT?

[it was expecting]

QUOTE THREE;

a; another word for pig

b; PORK

c; BACON

d;BOAR!

a; its two syllables

b; WILD BOAR

c; LEON!

[times up]

a; it was hedgehog

b, c, d and the rest of the group; WHAT.. A HEDGEHOG ISN'T A PIG!?!?!?!?

a; oh.. really

b; its like.. a porcupine echidna thing. [ i know i spelt echidna but spell check is saying that i suld of written lovesick. i don't know how they got love sick from echnidna. ]

IM NO PIG!

that is all

question; why is there an open in australia. like..no one is good in tennis is australia

they suld have it in sweden or something.

how is your love life?

2010-01-19T16:14:00.002+11:00

so i was watching tennis

fedz verses andeerz or something like that

and i was wasting time on crunchyroll [it was once a good site before all their drama etc left and now its purely anime]

and in one of the forums it asked

'how is your love life?'

im thinkin that if you musn't have much of a love LIFE

if u are asking random otakus if they have one too.

the responses were quite funny

hamstie ; mine??? is pretty boring

kurono ; mine... to be honest, i think it fails

maoxinga ; my love life is an epic fail

drewchan ; I asked this guy who I liked out on MSN, he said yes, but he never talked to me in real life... We went to the cinema and the park, and he talked then, but all we did was talk and hug once.But he never talked to me much other than the twice we went out (cinema and park) so I dumped him on MSN, since that was the only place he would talk to me. [thats pretty fail]

versailles89; I've been single for four years...

And now I have three guys interested in me:

* one want's to use me to cheat on his wife....

* the other is desperate and also cheating on his wifes (yes, WIFES... how sick is that!!!!!?)

* the third is a really creepy stalker WHY ME!!!!

I'm not going for anyone of them..., I'd rather be single for the rest of my life!

[thats pretty sad. :[ ]

mizbehavin; [this is the funniest love story.. like desperate muchhhh]

Anyways, it was still hot around September, so I used that excuses to go to his house for Air Conditioning....First day I went I waited for him to ask me out and hinted a lot, but he's just too hard headed to see. So I went again the next day using the same excuse. He still didn't ask me out. So then I cried about my ex-boyfriend in front of him and sneakily laid my head on his stomach as I cried. He was shy, he didn't even stroke my hair or rub my back to make me feel better. FINALLY, I gave up and asked him out. He got all shy but he said yes. He told me that the day after that, he asked him BFF Huan about how to date xD I was his first btw

haha , 'i cried bout my ex boyfriend and sneakily laid my head on his stomach as i cried' haha. thats just makes me..laugh.

everyone's reaction is like 'aww that is soo sweet. that is soo kawaii'

maybe im just emotionally barren.

my love life is very active.. hehe. i spend SO much time with him and everything.

yehh! didn't u guys know i was with someone? his name starts with h.

yeh its the hsc >.> OK I HAVE NO LOVE LIFE STOP TEASING ME GOSH!.

dodgy God

2010-01-18T23:26:00.002+11:00

http://www.titane.ca/concordia/dfar251/igod/main.html

pretty stupid.

me; hello god

'god'; hello what is your name

me; you should know my name

'god'; now i do

me; what is it then

'god'; 'it' refers to. i think

me; thats a lie

'god'; no its the truth

me; prove it

'god'; it is self-evident

me; your not god.

CUT DOWN!

i am missing you.

2010-01-17T18:30:00.002+11:00

oh dear i miss you terribly much

even though you are here.

and i am too

we aren't.

true fact!

2010-01-10T15:42:00.001+11:00

thats all.

do you want to be popular?

2010-01-06T20:28:00.004+11:00

because youve come to the wrong spot.

but blog stalking

this girl is hella popular

past tense

1st – New Years! @ kaaties/cheltocroft/burrrnetts -> schboozled -> hungover
2nd – jessie and jacqueline’s house/ rockdale
3rd – shopping @ hornsby with big mumma/ gym
4th – lunch @ towers with justin/justin’s/dinner @ granville/elise’s party

futuristic

6th – chillin with justin/rena’s ‘kings’ party
8th – beach (weather permitted)/ jasmine’s (?)/ dave vos’ party (?)
9th – shopping @ surry hills (?)/ 6way decisch -> wade’s 19th/sydney festival/video clip filming for Hector Hugh/mel’s house sitting house/ chantal’s house..i wonder what will happen if i stay home.
11th – b-b-beach (?) @ mona vale or curl curl + yannick goes to vietnam
12th – sally’s 18th!
14th – mc cracken’s gatho @ copacabana
15th – jasmine’s 18th!
19th – nicky’s 18th festivities @ bondi
23rd – big fucking day out 2010

but this girl beats her

- Movie Marathon with Bee.
- Trinity Fiesta
- Lexy's Carnivale Party
- Jo's new house - swimming & chilling
- Waterloo Park near my place with the mob
- Movie day at Shiny's house
- B'wood & City with the people
- Woy Woy lunch
- Shiny's house with Grace & Shiny
- Manly decade photo & dinner with fam
- macbook photos
- Shelly Beach with the CCC girls
- random msn screen caps & images
- Eddy's house
- Being asian @ Karaoke.
- Esther's Kitchen Tea in Darlinghurst
- State Library with Bee (and crashing into Paulie, Bet & Shaz)
- Sunshine Coast trip
- Circular Quay at night.
- Chatswood Outing with mob =D

AND THOSE WERE THE OUTINGS SHE HAS WENT TO.
WHEREAS THE FIRST GIRL INCLUDED OUTINGS SHE WAS GOING TO.
so like imagine how many MORE the 2nd girl will go out
crazy

eitherway. popular people.
grrr.

ok maybe i should actually study

2010-01-06T14:36:00.002+11:00

reading jenna's blog

and woah she is working SO hard.

SAT study day tomorrow. And it also happens to be a Wednesday which is a practice test day. Yes, we're doing a 3hr 45min practice test tomorrow

like 21 hours a week of study.

I'm so tired from our first study session already. 7 hours of studying with only one mi goreng break is kind of tough. but at least i can cherish all my study breaks now.

Holidays are finally here.. except it won't be much of a holiday since I'll be studying approximately 21 hours a week

On top of that, I still have to do all my school work and study really really really hard for Japanese next year so that I can top the stupidly easy subject.

like CRAP MAN

what have ive been doing

going out.

sleeping

tv-ing

stalking

GETTING NOTHING DONE AT ALL

[ok guys don't freak out she is studying for her SAT's but i think we should all take a leaf out of her page and follow her example]

*is leaf out of her page even a idiom or something i just made up*

*maybe its leaf out of her book*

so yeh, she is kind of motivating me to study

well technically my WHOLE SCHOOL is basically a motivation to study hard.

i wish ill actually work hard.

i think in the year 2009. i worked legitly hard for like 2 weeks. or something

everyone underestimates how lazy i really am

someone MOTIVATE ME!

nana's solution will be either;

1) FOOD but i dont' want to get fat

2) GET A BOYFRIEND. haha.. but im not as lucky as nana. guys run away from me!.

but im going to a 3 day lecture thingo for 4 unit so maybe that classifies as studying.

ive realised that.. maybe going out every other day. is not how i should spent these holidays.

i think ive been living 2009 as

PLAY and fit study around that

and everything i was invited to ill be like I HAVE TO GO!

like dude.. i was out every weekend.

[but like.. don't think im popular or anything. i just.. end up having something on. ]

but now it should be

STUDY and .. don't even fit play JUST STUDY.

all work no play makes alison a dull girl

but a smart dull girl.

so im off to do more pe notes

but like. ive spent literally 2 weeks on them

ok ILL MAKE A PROMISE TO THIS BLOG

that i will finish them today! [except for the nutrition bit. thats bit is SOO annoying]

ok im off. after i upload a few pics to go with this blog.

extended response

2010-01-05T19:23:00.003+11:00

so i was blogstalking [where i read like. everyone's blog]

and there seems to be a general consensus that

everyone doesn't feel like a new year has started

or they aren't looking forward to 2010

or they don't want to move on. they want to stay in the safety of the year 2009.

but me being weird/strange i beg to differ

im pumped for this year,

im pumped for my hardcore studying sessions in the library

im pumped for getting to know my girlies better, more dnms and more spastic times

im pumped for meeting new people

im pumped for having new experiences.

im pumped for the bad times

im pumped for the good times .

im pumped for finally graduating.

im pumped for seeing how much i grow this year, spiritually, mentally, physically [YES I WILL STILL GET TALLER LENNOX!]

and thinking that 2010 is not only the start of a new year. but also a DECADE

meaning that the next decade ill be 26

i would have finished uni

ill be working

ill [hopefully] be married.

imagine all the things i would have accomplished by then

like... thinkin back to the year 2000

where i was only 6.

how much have i grown and matured.

makes me dead excited to see what God has planned for me.

SO HELL YEAH C'MON 2010!

totes tanked the human pyramids today

i don't think many people can say that they have been on both the

TOP of a 4 layer co-ed human pyramid

and THE BOTTOM of a 4 layer co-ed pyramid

haha the boys were all dead scared that they will kill my back

'i don't want to go to your mum and go 'here is your daughter, she turned into a pancake''

BUT I SURVIVED

wez said that tomorrow i wont be able to even get out of bed because my back will kill.. but thats okay. coz ive got all my textbooks on my bed anyway. STUDYFESH

numbers

2010-01-03T16:46:00.002+11:00

today i realised that

as humans, we govern our lives by numbers

to beat that deadline, a date represented by numbers

to get somewhere on time, a notion shown by numbers

to get that mark, those red numbers in front of our exam paper

to get that atar, a rank shown by 4 numbers with a decimal point in between.

the money in our wallet, pieces of plastic with numbers on the upper right corner

our pets can be microchipped with a number

humans are identified as various id numbers

doesn't it feel like we are trapping ourselves with just a bunch of squiggles from 0-9.

*shrug* but what would i know.

2009, you were fine.

2009-12-30T23:26:00.002+11:00

charlotte commented that

this year i didn't have the '1st of December blues'

and i didn't because, 2009 was quite a good year

jan-

in jan i spent a lot of time just.. relaxing and procrastinating before the school term started

it was a nice time. i really liked it

feb -

in the beginning of the school year i met katie and nana, two of the most gorgeous girls to just sit and dnm in our study frees.

or buy stuff to eat

or just be super girly and everything

to think that i was scared of new people. they really reminded me that change was good.

also made friends with people i dont' usually talk to

like pris

gemma

anshul

because you in totally new classes

but then you lose contact with people in your old classes

i remember

the conversations of this whole month was like

'omg i miss you so much.. no more 10 q'

school started and the pressure started.

i took it pretty chillaxed in the beginning. maybe a little bit TOO chillaxed but whatever

march -

started getting so excited for vienna

thats all my diary is telling me now

haha

i remember being involved in like a gazillion things

grapevine

waterpolo

band

vienna band

ok not that many things. but it felt like it at the time

water polo was pretty fail.

but the party at the end made it all worth it

plus got another signature for my minerva awards

april-

DUDE VIENNA

LIKE BEST TIME OF MY LIFE.

thats all ive got to say

may -

may was when i started going out every week.

hectic schedule

officially quite flute

it was really weird because i texted her saying' sorry ive been really busy.. im going to stop flute for a while' and then the next day she saw me in the city.

june -

EXAMS HALF YEARLY

thats really it.

this month was pretty mediorce

i think this was when i was getting really mean and pms-y and angry

sorry for always getting angry at you.

july -

JAY CHOU concert

very good

also the hols started

DBL WITH THE GIRLS

transformers

EC CAMP

ec camp was really good

bonded with the boys a lot

bonded with each other a lot

so many dnms

ko and nana's partay.

me failing bball ^^
HUMAN PYRAMIDS WAS SO MUCH FUN

i remember doing legal studies at my house

and jade and paik helping themselves to my kitchen

but

we did so much work that day!

chinese bbq

was like

8 hours of continuous eating

it was quite fun!

august -

RICE RICE BABY

even tho it wasn't as great as last year

it was still really good

got to meet so many more brothers and sisters in christ.

and i could really see God's work

and i was like. crying when we were singing 'surrender'

im liek YEA I WILL SURRENDER ALL!

well im trying to now.

i was like.. close to heaps of guys thsi month

okay only 2

but yehh stopped talkin to them completely now.

pretty sad.

alison the 'relationship killer' get close with a guy for 2 months and totally stop talking

sept-

i open my pages and alli see is DO NOTES

DO NOTES

STUDY STUDY

but i actually did do notes

study.. i didn't do that muchh

oh well. they didn't count

after exams it was liek partay everyday

semis was good.. dancing the night away

syd opera house with lok was good the music wasn't great but i liek spending time with lok

lipsync was funny

and very soon it was..

oct -

HOLIDAYS

went to anshul's house to have a gilmore girls marathon = FUN

mid autumn fest - playing with fire with the kids.. probably not a good idea but whatever

watched UP , good movie

crashed at kt, kos and gok's house.

joey's party - lasertagging which ended up being me bashing up brandon

SHINE 09 - ice cream at 11 pm in the city CHOICE

hsc started.. but everyone did great.!

had our 7 am excursion which wasn't that bad

nana lost her camera but SHE FOUND IT AGAIN SO IT WAS ALL GOOD

met the boys. aka dippy jd dave mick ivan

my life is so much happier now

haha

NOICE

CHOICE

NO WORRIES ABSOLUTELY NONE

SICK

BEAST

my new vocabulary

nov -

started bballin for pdhpe

chats formal - wasn't the best time ive had, but it was still good fun , dancing with randoms.

lins party - was so much fun.. hyper fun in wagaya and lap dance from nana WOOT

kelvin and esthers wedding - SO CUTE! kin ; how can someone be so happy for so long me; SHUT UP KIN

ringo surprise party - was soo funny!

dec -

live out loud - so inspirational! first itme hanging with allc. good fun.

dnm with darren

exams, haha went to live out loud halfway thru them shows how much i cared

i should of cared more

coz i didn't do that well

oh well.

BEACH PARTAY - walkin in coles with bikinis is mad awesome

baking at anshuls - our super win cake

shopping after speech day - spent over 50 dollars on accessories

legal party - goodbye mr farrell :[ I WILL STALK YOU

pdhpe party - goodbye ms legge i probably wont stalk you , sorry

hardcore carols. but it all turned out good

lunch at kt's GIRLY DAY!

good chick flicks good food GREAT FRIENDS

anshuls' party at bite me! totally yummay

and tomorrow is NYE

ok this post was totally useless ill refine it next year

but this was just for funskies.

cya babies

what is love?

2009-12-26T23:30:00.002+11:00

according to love.music from asianfanatics.

to me love is when you selflessly care for someone. when they cry u would wanna cry when their happy u feel happy too.
when they feel pain u would wanna be the one that endures the pain instead.
its when you cant sleep at night just because you miss them so much.
when you feel that just seeing them for a min is all that matters.

that

has got to be one of the scariest things ive ever heard.

sgman said ;

Love is just a bunch of chemicals running amok in your brain.

and fang 84 said;

This is no such thing as love. Only hormone regulation and direct interaction with serotonin related enhancers. In fact I know logically I can't be in relationship with some people. It simply wouldn't work and things would get in the way. However, if you have sex with them and let all those emotional reactions cascade soon you'll find that all sense and reality is fallen to the periphery as impossible things come into being. Pretty horrible stuff.

sad face! that is possibly more scarier than the first one.

awkward

2009-12-21T22:34:00.001+11:00

awkward-

wearing my jesus all about life tshirt

in a morman church

not awkward-

having nana undo my bra with one hand.

a word of thanks.

2009-12-18T23:18:00.003+11:00

a word of thanks. because i don't think i thank people enough.

kirsten;

thankyou for letting me crash at your house anytime anywhere

thankyou for laughing at my jokes

thankyou for listening to my endless rants

thankyou for telling

thankyou that you always want to spend time with me

thankyou for all the things u give me

thankyou for spending time with me

thankyou for baking food for me

thankyou for always caring

thankyou for always being there for me when i just need someone to hug

thankyou for everything.

joey;

thankyou for helping me out with bball.

thankyou for becoming my temporary mother in europe

thankyou for always willing to help

thankyou for the good times [ie. superbly hyper times]

thankyou for letting me crash at your house all the time

chloe;

thankyou for listening to my rants bout boys during biology

thankyou for making biology bearable

thankyou for all the nice things u say about me

thankyou for caring.

nana ;

thankyou for making me go to rice

thankyou for always helping me with maths

thankyou for always giving me food

thankyou for hearing my rants

thankyou for always lending me money

thankyou for intro-ing me to your church and yg

thankyou for all the times [which seem to be increasing] we spend together bumming, churching, 'studying'

katie;

thankyou for listening to my rants at 1 am.

thankyou for unleashing my inner super girly-ness

thankyou for being supportive

thankyou for being encouraging

thankyou for motivating me to study

jessica;

thankyou for our bumming sessions

thankyou for our fun times

thankyou for our rants about everything

thankyou for the endless conversations about magazines

thankyou for all the knowledge i now know bout how the people in magazines aren't really that pretty, its all makeup and photoshop.

thankyou for the FREE SUSHI

jeremy;

thankyou for still being my friend when i was angry at you

thankyou for teaching me things

thankyou for the lifts back home

thankyou for clearing up misunderstandings

thankyou for basically being my only 'real' guy friend.

summer holidays

2009-12-16T22:02:00.002+11:00

so the time that every school student looks forward to.

the summer holidays

to say a momentary goodbye to stuffy classrooms

of droning teachers

of staying up late to do homework

of assessments

of waking up early

of the bottomless pit of homework

of the anti-social life.

and say HELLO to

beaches

christmas

sleeping in

days of nothingness

of bad tanlines.

movie marathons

and girly days.

btw. i love you jack dawson.

the reason

2009-12-12T07:54:00.001+11:00

oh yea i know what happened.

you just found better things to do.

yehh.. how could i forget

what happened?

2009-12-11T22:54:00.004+11:00

what happened to talking from 5 -11 pm?

what happened to our long goodbyes?

what happened to our long webcam sessions?

what happened to our 'no secrets' policy?

what happened to telling each other everything?

what happened to saving a new chatlog every week?

what happened to the weird seedy conversations we had together?

what happened to seeing each other like at least twice every week?

what happened to the text messages we used to send all the time?

what happened when 5 minutes was considered a mega bar?

what happened to being close ?

what happened to being best friends?

what happened to us?

im so tired of thinking bout this .

i want to just give up

throw the towel

why am i soo willing to cling onto this.
a 'has been'
a 'once was'
a 'probably never again'
a 'one hit wonder?'

why.

to you; please reply to this.

bored of normal basketball?

2009-12-09T18:47:00.002+11:00

bored of normal basketball?

im pretty sure many males out there would be like 'never! ill never be bored of normal basketball' but since none of them really read this, the ladies could be amused by other variations of basketball...

so i was researching basketball [more specifically to see if there were any specific rules applying to mixed basketball] and i went past this

so there something called

water basketball

Water basketball, played in a swimming pool, merges basketball and water polo rules.

Slamball

Slamball is full-contact basketball, with trampolines. Points are scored by playing the ball through the net, as in basketball, though the point-scoring rules are modified. The main differences from the parent sport is the court; below the padded basketball rim and backboardare four trampolines set into the floor which serve to propel players to great heights for slam dunks. The rules also permit some physical contact between the members of the four-player teams.

Unicycle Basketball

Unicycle basketball is played using a regulation basketball on a regular basketball court with the same rules, e.g., one must dribble the ball whilst riding. There are a number of rules that are particular to unicycle basketball as well, e.g., a player must have at least one foot on a pedal when in-bounding the ball. Unicycle basketball is usually played using 24" or smaller unicycles, and using plastic pedals, both to preserve the court and the players' shins. In North America, popular unicycle basketball games are organized.^[28].

epic ness!

i want to play slamball

TRAMPOLINES! yay!

not studying

2009-12-06T23:26:00.002+11:00

decided to ban myself off msn until tues arvo.

but ive still done nothing

just look through questions going 'yeh. whatever i know how to do that'
and continues to watch more tv.

oh well. might as well call it an very unproductive day
wake up tomorrow
AND PRAY that i actually do some studying.

4 UNIT HERE I COME.

btw. has anyone realised that whilst 3 unit cambridge is a bitch
4 unit cambridge is strangely nice and self esteem raising.

i quite like you. 4 unit camb.
nearly as much as patel.

and yeh.. these days i find myself talkin to my maths equations
its like

'WHY AREN'T YOU WORKING.. WHY .. WHY MUST YOU NOT BE A MULTIPLE OF 4. WHY?
c'mon man be a multiple of 4.. just to amuse me mate. just a 4, or an 8 or a 16.
ok. whatever. mr burley . show me the answer! [he gave us his own solutions]
WTH. WHERE DID U GET THAT EXTRA Y FROM?
oh.. wait
OH I FIND YOU , YOU SNEAKY LITTLE Y u were hiding in the front tryin to hide from me
WELL IVE FOUND YOU
haha u can never beat me .. i am just TOO AWESOME
i RULE OVER YOU MATHS EQUATION!!

yea. im TOTALLY sane.

GL eco and chem ppl! whilst ur examing.
ill probably be still sleeping
well for the people who do chem at least.

another funny quote

coming home from live out loud

ash; are you a mommy's boy bubbles?
bubbles; *nods*
me ;ngaw.. yehh mostly boys are closer to their mothers.
ash; ok. this is gonna freak you out. but ur going to marry someone who is going to be very similar to your mother
bubbles *nods nervously*
me; yehh.. its so true. like.. i look for guys with my dad's qualities.
nana; i think its just people who u look up to. i look for guys with my brother's qualities
ash; yehh.. you might not think it when u first get married, but after 30 years.. ull find out that she is just like your mother.
evan; *just heard the conversation* EWWWWWWWW YUKKKKKKKKKK I AM NOT MARRYING MY MOTHER *runs away*
all the girls; ...

it was you.

2009-12-06T17:48:00.004+11:00

me; *singing you belong with me*
char; whats that song? i never heard of it
phils; YOU DON'T KNOW.. even i know!
kin; do you know who intro-ed that song for me?
phils; wasn't it some girl
kin; no.....it was you.

my heart is finally free.

2009-12-05T18:18:00.002+11:00

When the darkness settles in
And the world caves in all around me
You're all I need
When my life becomes so easy
And I have everything I've ever dreamed
You're all I need

And now I am finally home inside your love
And the hope I have in You is more than enough
And with all You've done my heart is finally free
'Cause You're all I need
You're all I need

When my heart is in despair
And there's no one left that cares for me
You're all I need
When my days are all complete
And I'm met with things I've never seen
You're all I need

I lift up my hands and give You it all
My life, my heart, my hope it's all Yours

last night when i prayed the prayer with steve chong

my heart which has felt so

heavy

burdened

empty

and filled with irrational wants and desires

was suddenly

set free. and it felt whole. for once since a very long time.

omg ily God. ^^

learning to let go. and knowing that we had fun.

hugs for kirsten.

2009-12-03T22:22:00.001+11:00

i don't feel that great either :[

deep words from facebook.

2009-11-30T19:26:00.003+11:00

just wasting my time on facebook whien i should of been studying..

found a few pictures.

deep/

i love you!

2009-11-30T19:15:00.002+11:00

there is only

ONE thing

TWO do

THREE words

FOUR you....

I LOVE YOU!

[I Love You Day is celebrated globally on the 30th of November each year. It is a day to acknowledge the people in your life that are special to you. ]

and.. EVERYONE WHO READS MY BLOG IS SPECIAL TO YOU

SO I LOVE YOU ALL!

now.. back to business.

[the subject]

ciao!

weddings

2009-11-28T21:26:00.003+11:00

kelvin and esther <3>

jeremy ; you know.. in 4-5 years time, we will be visiting people our ages' weddings?

me; what? ... siff 4 years... at 20?

jeremy; yehh like.. 21ish to 22. thats when people start getting married yea..

me; .. good point.. wow. thats scary.

marraige was always a 'big people thing'

but then

it wasn't that long ago when year 12 was a 'big people thing'

or being a senior was a 'big people thing'

or high school ....

omg. im getting so old.

security.

2009-11-25T23:42:00.003+11:00

security

ive realised that

knowing more about a person, than that person knows about me

gives me one of the biggest sense of security

stalker . yes.

insecure. yes.

yeah im probably one of the most insecure people in the world.

im just very good at hiding it.

Tim says:

okay, that's kinda disturbing

maybe you should get a normal hobby LOL

googlegooglegooglegoogle.com

2009-11-21T20:29:00.001+11:00

googlegooglegooglegoogle.com = four independent google search engines = coolness